Progress and self doubt
- Carol Hodge
- Sep 29, 2019
- 2 min read
I knew it was coming, and today it landed. I finished off recording vocals for the final track on my upcoming solo album, and started listening through to all the songs, with a view to making arrangement notes. It started innocuously enough, with a "hmm is this really the perfect tempo for this song?", and stemmed from there. Right now, about 80% of me is thinking I've wasted my time, this album is nowhere near as good as the previous one, who do I think I am, hardly anyone will hear it, and the people who will are only being nice and doing so through pity. Phew. Thankfully the other 20% of my noggin is being more supportive and telling me "even if all the above is true, does it really matter? Just enjoy the process, and do it for you". Thank you, 20%.
I share all this not to invoke pity, interest or any reaction really. I think we are all way too hard on ourselves, and this is a recent example of this behaviour in my life. We often overestimate our own importance, and I am certainly a victim of self-aggrandisement. Being a musician and songwriter is a weird tightrope between lacking in confidence and basking in the limelight. I sometimes find it hard to locate the reality, and the middle ground.
As a slightly odd, but related aside, I had a dream the other night that everyone wrote and released solo albums. It was simply a part of society, like celebrating birthdays and paying the rent. This reminded me that what I'm doing isn't special, or different, but just a statement of my innermost thoughts, my view on the world and a record of my lifelong journey as a songwriter. It's always going to be different to my previous album, as I'm a different person now compared to 16 months ago, and I'll be a different person again for the next album I write.
In conclusion, as with so much in life, too much time is spent overthinking and making projections about the future, coupled with being overly concerned about the opinions of others. Some people will hate this album. Some will be quite fond of it. I really am giving it my best shot, and that's kind of what matters the most. My name will be on the front, so I guess I'd better start getting proud of it.
This was a very interesting and enjoyable read that provided both clarity and inspiration. The way the author presented simple ideas with such depth was impressive and easy to follow. It highlights how important it is to pause and reflect, especially for students dealing with academic responsibilities. As a business student managing multiple assignments, I sometimes explore Help with Business Assignments when I need extra guidance on difficult topics. Reading posts like this helps me stay focused and positive. It’s always great to come across content that supports both personal thinking and academic development.
This was a very enjoyable post to read. The calm and reflective tone made it easy to connect with the ideas being shared. I appreciate how the author focused on the importance of noticing small details in everyday life. As a student working on design-related subjects, I sometimes look for AutoCAD Assignment Help to improve my understanding of technical drawings. Reading blogs like this gives a refreshing break from academic pressure while also inspiring creative thinking. Content like this is both relaxing and motivating for learners.